Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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