its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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