so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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