so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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