She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
