to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
