So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
