on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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