Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
