a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
