Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
