is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
