So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
