38 yer olds are good kisserssss
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
