I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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