You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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