my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
