You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
