we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
