When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
