she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Text me some of your sweat
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