Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
