I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
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