I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
