Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Randomize
