im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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