Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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