so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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