I wish I could teleport
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
