can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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