Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
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