So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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