Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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