Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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