Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
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