11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize