i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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