we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
