My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
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