the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
