And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
