My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
