i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
