I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
