it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I think my moral compass just broke
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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