best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
3pm strippers are depressing
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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