we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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