Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
