This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
