Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
