that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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