hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
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